FEMDOM MARRIAGE 2
From Nicole M:
Hi there, Elise. I can't tell you how excited I was to discover your lovely site. I share your philosophy and I've been meaning to write to you but never followed thru until now. I have debated whether to share my story with you but I have finally decided that it is worth telling. Please do not use my real name. Just call me Nicole M (for mysterious).
Where should I start? I'll try to keep this as brief as possible. I am a mature woman in my mid 60's. When I was a young woman in my twenties, I married a very gifted and successful International Asset Manager and Investor. In the 1960's and 1970's, he was World Renowned among Corporations in the field that he specialized in. He came from a rather wealthy family but I came from just a middle class family. We met, I was taken by him, he swept me off my feet and we were married. We were very well off financially and we inherited his father's large wooded estate, located in New England.
The marriage started out great but my husband was away most of the time due to his profession, so I got rather lonely by myself in our large house. We never had children and we both were only childs, so we didn't have a large family. When my parents died (both within 5 years of my marriage), I was really alone. Due to this, I kept busy in social circles and I was active in all kinds of charitable and social organizations. I was pretty well known in our community because of who my husband was.
Needless to say, my husband had a very stressful occupation. Like you, I have been an out going and aggressive woman all my life (spoiled as an only child and spoiled by my wealthy husband). We had a great sex life (I think my husband married me because I was so good in the sack). However, after about 6 years into our marriage, things went pretty cold. Then one day, I found some fetish type material (magazines and pictures) in my husband's desk in his den. I was a little shocked but I also got aroused because the majority of these pictures and erotic tales were about women dominating men. I remember that it took me weeks before I got the courage to confront my husband about them but it lead to a very open discussion.
I found out that he had developed strong submissive desires toward women. He always had them but I guess because he was in such demand in his profession, that he needed an escape where he could be the prisoner of a woman and relieved of domestic responsibilities and decisions. That was what he confessed to me. I became very aroused at the prospect of him submitting to me. Since he was who he was, I was always the submissive wife around him (which went against my true dominant nature).
It took me some days to digest all that he confessed to me but I finally told him that I wanted to pursue this fantasy of his. I told him that I was doing it because I felt it would be a great stress reliever for him, but the truth was that I wanted to dominate him for selfish reasons. I was bored and this was opening a whole new interest within me.
Back in the late 1960's and early 1970's, there was not much material available on Female Domination, especially in this country. My husband got most of his material in Europe when he traveled over there. He brought me publications and books and he even paid a man he met in a bookstore in Germany to translate the text so I could read them. He bought me fetish outfits, toys, and he even purchased D&S equipment and furniture. We transformed our basement into an actual dungeon and he sealed it off so the only entrance was through a sliding bookcase.
You would have loved our play space (we called it a dungeon back in those days). I read about the play space in your office in "The Leather Couch" article and it reminded me of our dungeon. We had bright red carpeting, mirrored walls, and a high ceiling with hooks and chains hanging from it. My favorite piece of equipment was this leather sling that left the submissive dangling on his back helplessly with his knees spread and lifted so he was very accessible for strap-on and dildo play. We started our dungeon slowly and kept adding to it. We found ourselves spending many nights in our new favorite room.
I was now in my early to mid thirties and our sex lives took off into a whole new direction. S&M (which is what it was called in the early 1970's) and Female Domination dominated our sex and social life. People thought we had dropped off the face of the earth as we rarely attended the old boring social affairs in our community like we use to. I started to travel with my husband to Europe and we joined a Swiss underground S&M group of upper class couples. I learned a lot from these people in the few short years we were active. I met some really kinky and dominant European women and I drew from their knowledge and experience (I could write entire stories about some of our functions and fetish parties).
So that is the background to the story that I now want to share. Our lifestyle grew and our appetites kept growing for more kink and more female domination (at least mine did). In the late 1970's, I made my husband's fantasy a reality. He became my prisoner. We blocked spaces in our storage area in our basement and made them into jail cells, complete with locking bar doors. We started with one but over the years we ended up with four cells. I became the Queen ruler of our estate. Through all the S&M play, I got my husband to surrender everything over to me. He was cutting back his hours and not traveling as much so he was home about as much as a normal working husband. When my husband entered my estate, he became my total slave with no rights of his own.
He had to address me as Mistress Nicole and I called him slave. Most of the time I made him strip naked other than his slave collar or don feminine attire. If it was cold, he had to wear his prisoner uniform I had specially made for him (complete with ankle and wrist shackles). Most nights I made him sleep in his prison cell that I locked. I controlled his every coming and going. He had to wait on me hand and foot. We had a maid and a gardener that attended to our estate a couple days a week, but I still made my slave husband do chores around the house. I often feminized him if no one else was coming around the house that day. Our relationship totally began to change. Even though we were still legally married, our relationship evolved from wife and husband to Mistress and slave. I gradually cut him off from intercourse and eventually he was permanently denied orgasms. I had a specialty chastity belt made in Europe for him and I kept his genitals locked up most of the time. I took him to our dungeon often for S&M play and I occasionally freed him from his chastity belt during this time so I could torment his genitals during his discipline and domination sessions.
Like most couples I have read about or talked with, our lifestyle kept growing. We started out pretty mild with just spankings and female body worship but over time, it developed into pretty intense S&M. I found that I had a sadistic streak and that my husband was a natural masochist. We never heard of the terms safe, sane and consensual back in those days or about safe words but my love for him caused me to always check with him to make sure that he was also enjoying our sessions. However, my primary focus was on taking him to new depths in submission while I experienced more power and control over him.
Occasionally some friends who were also in this lifestyle came to visit and would play with us (the woman had to be the Dom for me to invite them). We even hosted some fetish parties at our house. In the early 1980's, I began to add other male slaves to my stable. I advertised in some S&M publications in both Europe and New York and after an extensive screening process, I selected three other men to be my full time slaves. I took these additional slaves on, one at a time. I trained one per year before I took on another one.
I lived like Royalty. I no longer needed a maid or a gardener, as my slaves did everything. They all had good paying jobs but I made them quit and get jobs in the New England city that was 30 miles from where we lived. They all had to sign all of their possessions over to me and give me their paychecks. In return, they lived on my estate. They slept in one of my prison cells, they did chores around my place and in return I dominated them. People wouldn't believe how many men are willing to give everything up to live as a slave to a sadistic and dominant woman.
Each slave started out as my cuckold. Each was young and handsome and I first used them to humiliate my now denied and chaste husband. Much like Ms Denise in your one story, I would lock my husband in his cell for the night and take my new lover to bed. Too bad I never thought of doing what Ms Hillary did about piping the sounds from my bedroom into my husband's cell. I can't believe that idea never occurred to me.
After about a year, my submissive lover became a slave and he was cut off from sex and placed in a chastity device. Then I would interview and select the next male lover and eventual slave. Elise, I was doing this stuff before anyone ever heard of The Other World Kingdom. I would whip and torture my slaves as I would fulfill every one of my always growing sadistic desires (I made sure each man was a bit of a masochist). I had no idea when we started that I was going to become such a ruthless and cruel Bitch but it became natural to me and I could not obtain arousal without some form of domination of my slaves. My husband soon became just one of my slaves and all intimacy with him ceased. He was always my favorite and I spent more time with him than the others but cuckolding him while denying him turned me on to no end, so I never entertained the thought of allowing him to be my lover again.
My husband retired in the mid 1980's and he lived his final ten years as my full time slave and prisoner. His ultimate fantasy was realized, which is more than most men can say. He died six years ago, as he was only in his early 60's (he was 7 years older than me). I felt depressed about things for a few years after his death and I had to go for some counseling. I wish I had known about you. I really loved my husband and his death was very hard to deal with. What brought me out of my depression was a personal diary that I found of his. In it he expressed all of his feelings about the evolution of him going from world renowned International Investor and loving husband to becoming the slave and prisoner of his Mistress Nicole. In this diary, he expressed how satisfied and happy he was to be the slave of a beautiful woman. Even though he struggled at times with my selfishness and unquenchable lust for more dominance, he was able to surrender to his submissive desires and obtain fulfillment and peace. Elise, I would like to send you his diary to read as I think his well written thoughts about his submission will greatly assist you as you continue to study and analyze submissive men.
Even in my depression, I kept the other slaves. Two of them requested to leave me and I granted them their request. The one slave rejoined me as my lover about a year after my husband's death. I married him two years ago and he is still my submissive husband to this day. I gave my last slave to a French female friend of mine after I got re-married. She owns a few male slaves and it was a good fit for the both of them. I sold the estate last year and I now live in an apartment in New York with my new husband.
When I look back on my life, I am grateful that I could fulfill my late husband's fantasy, as well as the fantasies of three other men (including my current husband). I have lived a pretty spoiled and selfish life and there were times after my husband's death that I felt guilty about it. But after reading his diary, I now realize that a submissive man wants his woman to be selfish. In a kind of strange way, it is giving to a submissive man by taking from him. A submissive man cannot experience true submission unless his Mistress is selfish and a bit cruel. That is hard for most women to understand but I now realize this and it has helped to bring perspective and peace to me. Elise, I can honestly say that I would do it all again. I had a blast and I lived like Royalty, while at the same time making four submissive male's dreams come true. When I sold my husband's estate, I gave most of the money to charity as a tribute to him.
I told this story because I want other women to read it. I want to challenge women to explore their natures to the fullest. Don't hold back because one day you will be too old. If a woman is married to a submissive man, I would encourage her to find out how deep his submission runs and then take him to where he wants to go. Be selfish if that is what turns him on. Don't feel guilty about being a dominant woman. A submissive man wants to submit to you and treat you like a Goddess. Allow him to do that and enjoy being his Queen. Women have been mistreated by men since the beginning of time, so you owe it to your gender to fulfill your destiny as a Superior Female. By doing so, you will also be fulfilling your man's destiny.
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